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I Wore A Sleeping Bag For 48 Hours Straight And I Looked Freaking Fantastic

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I grew up in the way world. My mom is a fashion designer, and my sister is maybe the most glamorous woman alive.I was brought up in a cosmo where Vogue was the Bible, Karl Lagerfeld was Christ and ParisFashion Week was Jerusalem.( I also went to Catholic school and am highly aware of how blasphemous that sentence was, but don’t worry, I said, like, eight Hail Marys after I wrote it .)

My first swimsuit? A blue-and-orange Dolce and Gabbana one-piece that my mama would carefully coordinate with complementary floaties on my arms. The shoes I wore to my first day of kindergarten? White Gucci loafers.

I appreciate manner. I entail, as a business, it’s what paid for my food and my education. How could I not be grateful for it? Furthermore, I respect people who have a real passion for it. I ensure a brand new pair of Louboutins on someone’s feet, and I( first send a image to my sister to confirm that I spotted them correctly, then) admire it like some people can admire a Monet on display at the museum.

ButI dont want to expend two grand for uncomfortable shoes that I am probably definitely going to bust my ankle in when I could expend about $1,800 less for Uggs that make me feel like my feet merely stepped inside of a warm, fuzzy cloud. For me, consolation has always come first.

So when I assured that there was a wearable sleeping bag on the market, I thought to myself, SIGN ME THE F* CK UP.

I hope my mother and sister never even see this article because they will first succumbs and then flip over in their tombs. Yes, thats right. Ive written about getting f* cked up and hooking up with guys, but what I am the most afraid of my family reading is the article where I wear a full-body sleeping bag around township for two days.

But this sleeping bag is chic and could pass as a cool, trendy DVF winter coat. Or at the least, thats what Ill tell my sister or motherif they ever hear about this.

I am also from California, and this is going to be my very first real wintertime, as Ive learned the condescending people from the East Coast like to refer to their wintertimes.( Like, sorry, was my winter fake only because I could walk outside without freezing my tits off ?). I was not excited and was looking for any and every route to make it a more pleasant experience for myself. I got the nice weatherproof down jacket and requisitesnow boots, but I still didnt feel like I would be cozy enough. And coziness is hugely important to me.This sleeping bagwas exactly the cozy factor I was looking for.

So, here we go. If you are not my sister or my mother, please read along, as I expended two dayswearing my sleeping bagin pure, unadulterated bliss.

Obstacle# 1: Getting it on

Well, I couldnt quite wear it to work as immediately as I had hoped. The thing was an XL, and I am 54 and 100 pounds. So it was way too long.There are also holes for the arms, legs and head that you Guess would beeasy to navigate, but they’re tough to figure out without someone’s assistance. I was hoping my roommate would be home to help me with the process but, as is usual for me, I overslept and she was gone by the time I woke up. Disaster.

Also, if were being honest here, I was nervous. I talk big game about being all cool and confident, but the believed to be walking into my office decked out in this giant thing was a little intimidating, especially since I was walking in late. So I decided I would pack it up and bring it along with me and have my co-workers help me set it on.

They helped me get into the wearable sleeping bag, and, like any self-respecting person in this day and age, I lifted the develop and wobbled straight-out to the bathroom for a mirror selfie. I was slowly but surely starting to feel fly.

As I stimulated my style over to the bathroom( a full walking across the office ), my confidence began to grow. One guy stopped me to ask if I was really cold, but other than that, you know what people said? ZIP, ZILCH, NADA! Sure, people were probably talking mad sh* t over the office messagingapp, but who cares !?! I was more comfy than all of those suckers.

Obstacle# 2: Going to the bathroom

After my selfie, I figured I might as well get some business done while I was in the bathroom already. The only problem: I had JUST asked everyone to put it on for me! I couldnt take it back up and go back out there while they were all softly working to have them set it on again.

I decided to go with a simple but hygienically questionable approach: Pull it down and let it fall to the floor. Aimed up working great. If you ever find yourself having to use the facilities in a full-body sleeping bag, I highly recommend.

I got the deed done and was able to wobble my style back over to my desk.

Obstacle# 3: OVERWHELMING heat

So, at first, things were going swimmingly in my sleeping bag. I felt cozy and candidly very, very groovy.

But then the day went on, and I get very hot. I mean, like, SWELTERINGLY hot, you guys. I swear my office isnt even one of those places that puts the heat on explosion style too high when its cold outside. It was normal temperature in here, pretty cold outside and A BILLION DEGREES INSIDE OF THIS F* CKING THING.

I had never loved and disliked something so much at the same day. Is this the clothing equivalent of a hate-f* ck? IDK.

Obstacle# 4: Going out in public

Noon rolled around, and I was READY for lunch( okay, fine, it was 11:00 if were being realistic. I eat early ). This presented me with got a couple of problems.

First and foremost, I eat lunch EVERY day with my good friend and coworker, Kevin. Every day, YOU GUYS.But you know what happened that day? Kevin just so happened to be slammed with run. Fair-weather friend, am I right?

So there I was, left to go responding to the mean streets of New York City by my lonesome , nothing but my sleeping bag to protect me from the cold harsh world.

The first question was, how do I figure out a route to walk in it like a normal person? I went back to the bathroom for a little experimenting. Finally, I figured out the trick: Take the drawstrings that are at the foot, cinch them at my waistand let the rest of the suitcase fall over me like a dress! PERFECT! I looked fabulous and I felt competent. Hour to slap on my wintertime coat and reach the streets.

On the street, I realise something fantastic about New York City: I was nowhere near the weirdest person out there.

In my three-block stroll to Whole Foods, I came across an elderly lady dressed in a floor-length fur coat with matching earmuffs and hat, all of which were covered in butterfly brooches. I ran into a guy straight-up wearing plastic bags. And another guy in what could only be described as a bedazzled Darth Vader suit. FYI, I asked all of these people if they would be down to take a selfie for this article, and they all refused.

I decided I didnt look weird at all. In fact, I seemed STREET STYLE CHIC.

Obstacle# 5: Get on the subway

Finally, the working day had ended, and it was time to head home. Honestly, I wrote this phase as an obstacle because of the format Im utilizing for this piece, but thiswas NO OBSTACLE AT ALL.

Seriously, please do yourself a favor and wear one of these bad sons every time you ride the subway.Sure, I was absolutely sweltering. But I was also so comfortable, and I took up so much space that people HAD to respect my own personal bubble.

Obstacle# 6: Going in public with friend s

The next day rolled around, and Kevin was abruptly no longer too busy for me. My hypothesi is that he saw how much I was rocking it and couldnt assistance but WANT to be seen with me. But whatever, take what you can get.

Kevin and I decided to hit up Eataly, where I was presented with a whole new obstacle.

Obstacle# 7: REALITY CHECK

I know I had that moment of weakness before run the first day where I was nervous to show up in this thing by myself in front of all of my coworkers, but for the most portion, I really do have some through-the-roof confidence . To the point where its a little delusional.

It was day two, and I had really started to believethat people believed I looked like some sort of high fashion model on infringe from her runway reveal when Kevin caught some pics that demonstrated otherwise.

Yep, do you see that guy in the back left whose jaw is literally DROPPING at the sight of me? I guess I wasnt quite as fly as I thought.

Obstacle# 8: Saying f* ck it to the haters

This random dude on the street was visibly appalled by my wardrobe selections, but did I let that stop me ?! NO. I was comfy and warmer than him on that 28 -degree day. So I ran ahead and got my panini and Nutella-filled croissant and walked home from Eataly with my head held high.

Eventually thetime came to stop shaming my good family name and take off the sleeping bag. I’m currently dressed in Uggs, leggings, a sweater and a blanket scarf( LOL, could I BE any more basic ?). And I’m not gonna lie … I feel NAKED. Sure, itmade me look ridiculous and constructed me sweat profusely, but I lovedmy wearable sleeping bag. I loved the damn thing with my whole heart.

Eh , no need to be too melodramatic. I’ll probs bust it out as soon as I get home tonight.

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