I dont think theres any greater instance of mankinds superiority at the top of the food chain than the fact that we allow other animals into our homes for some mild amusement and companionship. Sure, there are instances of cross-species relationships across the animal kingdom, but humans are the only species that are doing it purely for the fun. Its various kinds of weird in a way.
When it comes to allowing animals to poop in our houses, there are two species that are more popular than any other: dogs and cats. Most people favor dogs, but most people also think that the plural of Oreo is Oreos”. In both instances, theyre wrong; the plural of Oreo is, in fact, “Oreo”, and cats are objectively better than dogs when it comes to being domesticated pets. Before you break down my doorway with torches and pitchforks, Id invite you to hear me out.
1. Cats are altogether less run
First things first: I will admit that the life of a puppy owned is full of awesome activities. You can take your furry friend out for strolls, play fetch on the beach, or teach him neat tricks. My cat, on the other hand, liked to cry at my window at six in the morning until I fed her, at which point she would fall asleep and dismiss me for most of the day. It can be a major bummer if you’re looking for a companion to do fun stuff with all the time, but as somebody with a more relaxed lifestyle, I’m pretty happy to have an animal that will( largely) gives people space. I spend most of my weekends going out until the wee hours of the morning, and the last thing I need in my life is to have to wake up early on a cold December morning with a hangover so I can pick up fresh, steaming poo, trying urgently not to vomit. Cats aren’t going to bark madly every time someone rings my buzzer, they’re not going to eat my shoes or tear up my sofa, and if I tried to take my cat outside and construct her fetch a stick for hours at a time, she’d look at me as if I was on narcotics. She respects my time, and I respect hers. It’s a wholly independent relationship.
2. Dogs give their love unconditionally, a cat’s love is earned
If youre a dog proprietor, youll likely be quite used to your canine friend greeting you with hundreds of thousands of licks and furiously wagging tail, as if he wasnt aware youd ever return( perhaps because he wasnt ). One of the sticks puppy owneds will beat cat devotees with is the notion that your cat doesnt love you, or care if you live or succumb. That categorically isnt true; cats love their humen even more than they love food, and if youve got a cat, youll know theyre just as affectionate as any puppy in their own style. I find that it takes time and attempt before your cat stimulates the decision to love you, and until youve proven yourself worthy of that love, a cat will treat you with the apathy and disdain such a stranger deserves. Dogs are manic balls of loving affection, but there’s no animal better than a cat at conveying the sentiment “you aint s ***, motherf *** er” until you prove yourself worthy. A dog may treat every stranger with a high level of curiosity or exhilaration, but a cat will bide its hour, watch and observe, before opening its heart to a human. To me, a cat’s love simply means more.
3. Cats are actually useful around the house
As you may already know, the common dog descended from the noble wolf, domesticated and bred over thousands of years to craft the perfect home pet. Cats, on the other hand, kind of simply depicted up one day and started chilling in people’s homes. Ancient DNA presents cats pretty much domesticated themselves, and that’s in part given the fact that the relationship between cats and people is naturally more symbiotic than that between dogs and people, where there’s a very clear hierarchy of master and topic. If you’ve ever come home to find a bird or squirrel carcass on your doorstep, you know that cats are somewhat efficient hunters, and if you have a pest problem, they’re really useful for catching mice. I’m not sure I’m any better for having witnessed my cat catch a large moth, toy with it as it frantically tried to escape certain demise, and eat it before vomiting it back up again, but it’s only an example of the subtle watchman work a feline get through in the home( in between its 14 hours of sleep a day ). Yeah, I know that some puppies were bred for specific tasks like herding or fox hunting, but when was the last day you owned that many sheep?
4. Cat are generally more fun to be around
A common delusion with cats and dogs is the idea that dogs are dumb, over-exuberant beasts, while cats are cold, calculating assassins who could destroy you at any second. In reality, cats are just as, if not more stupid, than your average puppy. Puppies are like that guy you knew at school who had mediocre grades and spend all his time at the gym, but now runs a successful bodybuilding business. Cats, on the other hand, can be like that university flatmate you had that seemed really smart or thoughtful and was doing a really complicated course, but managed to inundated the laundry room by trying to clean a duvet( spoiler alert: I was that flatmate ). A cat will try to jumping between kitchen counters, spectacularly miscalculate the distance, fall to the ground with a accident, bang and wallop, and still has the audacity to give you a stare that says: “what the f *** are you looking at? ” Watching a cat around the home as it gets confused by waterbeds, DVD players or even cucumbers is a great style to pass the time, and there’s a good reason that YouTube is absolutely full to the brim of cat videos. Puppies are lovely and affectionate and cuddly, but they’re not particularly good at maintaining me entertained.
5. They’re better for the environment
I’m going to be straight with you: owning any kind of domestic pet, especially one that devours meat, is not particularly great for those of us who don’t believe that climate change isa hoax devised by the Chinese. A 2009 volume published by Robert and Brenda Vale, entitled( a little controversially) Hour to Feed the Dog? The Real Guide to Sustainable Living, talks about the massive ecological footprint a domestic companion racks up, measuring the environmental damage in a unit called “global hectares”. A medium-sizeddog has the footprint of around 0.84 hectares, far more than the carbon footprint of a Toyota Land Cruiser( or the nation of Vietnam ), while a cat’s footprint is comparable to that of aVolkswagen Golf, likely because they’re a lot smaller. I mean, it’s not as as good as running wholly pet-less, but I’m sure Mother Nature will thank me for selecting feline over canine. Eventually.
6. They’re cheaper, too
When you take home your cat for the first time, there are some things you’ll need to pick up before. You need to get a collar, litter box, food … but that’s nothing in comparison to a dog. First off, because dogs tend to be much larger, you’ll have to dish out a lot of cash per month on dog food, but even the dogs of comparable sizings feed a lot more of your hard-earned money( and if they get emphasized enough, literally your billfold as well ). Spending money on leashes, grooming develop class or even ridiculously expensive chewing toys can really leave you broke at the end of the month, while your cat is entertained by a scratching post, got a couple of plaything mouse and whatever random cardboard box you have lying around the house. They pretty much groom themselves, too. The ASPCA even backs me up on this one: a study found that cats are style cheaper than your average dog, to the tune of up to $800 a year.
7. Yes, cats are various kinds of dorks … but that’s why they’re awesome
I’ve written this side-by-side comparison with a lot of love , not to mention anecdotes, but I’ve got to level with you here: my cat is an a ** hole. When she’s not vexing me on purpose, waking me up at obscene hours or constantly trying to knock me off balance while I fix lightbulbs, she’s aiming scratchings at me and jumping up on my plate as I try to eat something. Here’s the thing, though: I love her. Don’t get me wrong; puppies are great, but even with the giant ones, I feel as if they’re largely harmless, and the idea of mauling me never intersects their intellects. With my cat, I have no doubt that she’d to continue efforts to sever my carotid artery if I so much as looked at her funny, and that’s the reason she’s great. Even when she’s dragging a dead bird into my living room or staring directly at me as she employs her litter box, I know that she could destroy me if she so desired, and that makes it extra sweet when she doesn’t. I don’t know about you, but I think that most movie villains would be cooler to hang out with than the heroes; who’d want to get a brew with Luke Skywalker or Batman when you can cold with Darth Vader or the Joker? Sure, they’d probably try to kill you, but should you come out alive, you won’t be able to say you didn’t have fun.
Well, there you have it, cat lovers and dog fans. Of course, to each their own, and I don’t guess I’ll have converted all of you to cat fans. I do hope, however, that some of you attaining the decision to get a cat or a dog will look at the entertainment-based, fiscal and environmental perk, and build the right choice. You’d be barking mad not to.
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